my first love part 18 (the decision)

Every day when someone gets up from their sleep, all their thoughts will be focused on how they are going to spend their day? How they will spend their day without getting their moods spoiled?

But there are lots of things that spoils ones mood each day like the bus coming late and getting us take scolding from the boss for coming late, the stomach that tells it is hungry when you do not have time to grab even a cup of water, the friend that irritates you when you are already sad, a dog trying to come behind us and trying to frighten us, the boy/girl friend saying ‘we need to talk’, the enemy who shows of when you are yourself sulking in a corner, the machine that gets stuck in middle of something, the big traffic due to an unassisted traffic lights, the mobile network which does not have any network at the time of need, the current that gets cutoff when there is no charge in our mobile and more importantly the bladder which is getting full every time like an alarm in middle of an important complicated procedure.

In middle of all these problems we all find happiness, the happiness that comes from inside of ourselves by thinking of some old beautiful memories, the happiness that comes from seeing a baby smile, the happiness that comes from eating our favorite food, the happiness that comes from others wishes and encouragement, the happiness from seeing the rain, the happiness from the drops of water from our shower removing away all the dirt along with all our stresses.

Like these Anjana found her happiness while talking with Suriya Prakash. He was the sole reason behind her happiness. Even when she was in worst of her moods she felt a sort of relaxation when she heard his soothing voice. He was like a rain in middle of the hot dessert, like a cherry on top of the cake.

So she decided to talk when he too was silent for a long time, “Hey…  I am very sorry that I did not cut your call and left without even replying anything, even to your message. I was so confused that whether all these happiness will last forever?! And I was also afraid that what will happen when I hurt you?! What will happen when my parent does not accept you?! Please do not talk while I am talking. I feel so vulnerable in front of you. You know all my darkest secrets. You know I am not used to all these kinds of things. You know I have never talked to a stranger before.  But in spite of all these I talked with you.even called you as my ‘brother’.. haha..!!! when I needed a shoulder to cry over, you were the only one who dried up my tears. But, what if you become the person who hurts me?! I thought all these over and over, but among all these thoughts there was this small thing in a corner of my heart which told me that I am crazy to be thinking all these when I have already fallen for you…!!! I fell for you long back Suriya. Yes…!! I love you more than anything I have ever loved.. more than the junkies that I love…!!”